Pray

Prayer is probably one of my least practice activity in my spiritual life. In the past few months, God is telling me to pray to Him and that He wants me to talk to Him. Why do I not pray? Its not my pride (it may be) but mostly about my remorseful past. I turned away from God when I knew in my heart that I should not. When I faced circumstances many years ago, I didn't have strong roots in my heart to withstand them. Some may have said that my circumstances were so bad that they themselves probably would not have stayed strong either. Yes... my circumstances were so bad that I thought a lot of negative things about what to do with my life. I am glad I didn't take action. I had reasons not to take action. I have struggled and I have failed in some areas in my life that I am now suffering the consequences today. I wished I can go back and start all over but I know I can't. The consequences I am facing will take some time to heal. One of the consequences are finances and I know I won't have financial peace until I am caught up. That will take time. My other "consequences" are my health. I was born "hard of hearing". Now I have Multiple Sclerosis and diabetes. Anyway, my point is that, I knew my Bible and I knew what God expected from me with that knowledge. In my heart, I still feel that I do not deserve to pray and talk with God after what I did. I know biblically that I am forgiven by His Grace. Grace means undeserved love and forgiveness that I can go to God and pray. This will take me time to learn to accept God's grace in my heart. I need to have "grace" rooted in my heart. I know that as long as I repent my sins daily and talk with Him daily, God will be with me, give me internal peace and guide me through my circumstances. I should ask God for help. Psalm 40:13 God will not hear my prayers if I am willfully sinning. Micah 3:4 Prayer should be private. Matthew 6:6 Jesus taught me how to pray. Matthew 6:9-13 I should pray with an attitude of humility. Luke 18:9-14 I should pray in Jesus' name. John 16:23-24 I should pray all the time. Ephesians 6:18 I should pray without doubting. James 4:3 I should pray with the right motives. James 4:3 I should pray according to God's will 1 John 5:14-15